For my 15th birthday, my best friend and co-author of this blog, Justin, gave me a shirt that said “I live in my own little world... but it’s okay, they know me here.” I consider this to be one of the best gifts I ever got. As we start shopping for Christmas presents, I want to explain how to give a great gift.
1. Don’t give cash Everyone loves getting cash for Christmas, but that doesn’t make it a great gift. The shirt that Justin gave me probably cost around $10. If he had given me a $10 bill for my birthday, I probably would have put it in my ever-empty lunch account, effectively making my birthday present be M&M’s, a Twix bar, a Gatorade, and a pizza. This is what happens with cash... it gets spent. Granted, in larger amounts, cash has a different effect. For example, I used a lot of money from graduation to buy a nice case for my laptop (though I deposited the rest in a savings account). But I’m aware that the bulk of my audience won’t be able to spend more than $50 on anyone, making cash a no-no.
2. Give something that your friend wouldn’t think of It’s always nice to give someone what they asked for... but since when do people know what they want? The only time I remember staying content for a long time with a gift I specifically asked for was in 2005 when I got my iPod nano. If Justin had asked me what I wanted for my 15th birthday, I would not have asked for a shirt that would forever alter my personality. I’m not saying that Justin knew that the shirt would propel me into becoming a more outgoing person. But the gift still worked perfectly.
3. Give something that feels natural for you to give For my birthday a few years ago, my grandpa gave me a tool kit. I appreciated the tool kit and I still use it frequently. But what if I had gotten it from Justin, and Grandpa had given me a funny t-shirt? Would I be any less grateful for either one? No. But fixin’ stuff is already something I associate with Grandpa, and I already associate Justin with laughter. Even if Justin had given me a tool kit, it would hardly ever remind me of him when I used it. And a shirt would hardly remind me of what a wonderful grandpa I have. So, in a sense, it’s good to be somewhat selfish when you go Christmas shopping... if you know what I mean.
Naturally, the best gift anyone can get is Jesus, and I don’t intend to take away from that fact by writing about how to give material goods. This post is strictly written from a relationship perspective. With that much being said, though, I hope that everyone can now give a gift that says “I love you” rather than simply “I thought of you.”
When I first started this blog, a new post was something that you could expect every week. Now it’s like waiting for Christmas. Can you imagine what it would be like if updating my blog became a special occasion for everyone? The Faulty Jeans Bunny would hide flash drives and wireless network routers in plastic eggs. Car dealerships would have a “Ryan Updated His Blog” sale. Kids would line up at shopping malls to sit on the laps of escaped convicts dressed up like Ryan T. Wilson and Justin Venezio.
To my knowledge, nobody has ever reached such a high status from making a blog post every two weeks. But I’ve always wanted to become cool and famous on some level. I tried to use the music industry as the outlet for my last attempt at coolness. I wrote a rap that I could only memorize one line of... the line where I said that “when you give me a microphone, I’ll give you a show.” Although I quickly realized that rapping is not for me, I did stay true to my promise a month and a half after the church no-talent show. At Vacation Bible School last week, someone let me use the microphone in the crafts room.
Craft time was not the same the rest of the week.
Everyone told me I should be an announcer one day, citing that I “have the voice for it.” I feel like I turned an otherwise boring activity into entertainment for the kids. Who cares if furniture prices aren’t discounted when I make a blog entry? I’m cool on a smaller level... a more personal level. As long as I’m appreciated by someone, I’m happy.
That brings me to my main point. I know that nobody read that and thought, “Wow, a guy who wants appreciation... how strange.” We all want someone to express genuine appreciation for what we do. Keeping that in mind, maybe the best way to make people happy is to show some sort of gratitude to them. Not something over-the-top and unctuous... when I was vacationing in Alaska, I gave my mommy a hug and thanked her for taking the family on that trip. I know that her day was brightened. A hug can really mean a lot to someone.
Closing thought... if my loyal reader(s) want to declare October 3rd “Faulty Jeans Appreciation Day,” I’ll show up at parties to sign autographs and criticize everyone’s English skills. But first, I have to go set up for the Standing on the Ceiling Appreciation Day party I’m holding tomorrow.
June 6: Sometimes, less than my best is enough Right before my graduation ceremony, my German teacher from the last three years pulled me aside and asked me to be a German tutor this coming school year. Even though I didn’t give my best work in that class, she said that I performed brilliantly in the area of sight reading and comprehension, which is what German 1 students need the most help with. Even though I was not on top of all my homework, I still did well enough to impress my teacher. And she asked me personally to be a tutor for her students! Sweet dog, you know I’ll be taking that offer. I get to practice teaching!
June 7: Sometimes, my best is less than enough My girl buddy broke up with me. I felt somewhat insulted. I did everything the best way I knew how, and, despite my lack of prior experience, I have come to discover that overall, I was a pretty good boyfriend. Although she was right to say that my lack of experience was detrimental, I still never felt like she valued me on the level that I valued her. It wasn’t fair that she broke up with the only one who tried to make the relationship work. But if life was meant to be fair, we’d all burn in hell. In cases like this — when you invest your best and get little return — the best thing you can do is try to improve on what your best is. In this case, I can use the lessons I learned about what kind of girl I’m looking for. And, just as a side note to the girl(s) who read this blog, take a lesson: unless your boyfriend blows up your car on a Friday night, don’t break up with him on a Saturday morning.
June 16: I’m not the same man I was a year ago On June 16th, I was at Camp WOW, the youth camp my church has gone to during the last three summers. I had a lot of stories I wanted to blog about, but I don’t have time to type all of them out, so I picked out my favorite one: me against the trapeze. At the camp, there is a 30-foot pole known as the power pole. After putting on a harness, one climbs to the top of the pole and stands at the very top, which is comparable in size to a bagel. Upon standing on top, the climber is to turn around and jump toward a trapeze that is suspended in the air about 5 feet away. On the 15th, I climbed but fell off before I reached the top. But I tried it again, waiting in line for 90 minutes under the unshielded sun with an already painful sunburn. And this time, I made it to the top and I caught the trapeze. I used to be a quitter. My dad once told me that he constantly noticed me trying something that didn’t work the first time, then giving up. Phone calls, scholarship applications, job applications... you name it, I’ve given up on it after failing once. But that’s not me anymore.
I have posted time and again about problems I have in life, and they don’t go away. Today, when I was sitting in my room, I was thinking about some problems I’ve been having recently with one of my friends in particular. When I was thinking about my problems with her, I made a connection to the stupid whack-a-mole games at Gatti Town and Six Flags.
When the game first starts, you can whack each mole that comes up, and you can beat them all down easily. As the game goes along, they start coming up faster and in greater numbers. Eventually, no matter how skilled you are, it becomes impossible to hit each and every one. My problems are the same way. At first, there were only a few of them, and they were easy to manage. Now they come more frequently and they’re harder to manage. And this game of whack-a-mole is slowly becoming impossible for me to win.
Then it dawned on me. Maybe what I need is a bigger mallet... like God, for example.
In my aptly-named post “Super Bowl Post,” I let my loyal reader(s) know that praying for patience doesn’t result in just becoming patient, but rather tests of patience. I would soon find out just how right I was.
I prayed for patience after I made that post, and just 9 days later, my uncle was found dead in his home in Alabama. That same day, the worship director from my church in Tulsa died on the operating table. And later in the week, I had relationship issues and a near miss on the road that could have turned into a fatal wreck. But in the end, it all worked out. The lessons I learned from that week have started paying off.
Prior to the worst week of my life, I thought I was ready to have a girlfriend at any time, and I got a bit hasty. But in retrospect, it’s a good thing my first attempt failed... because it opened up the door for my current girl buddy. She’s already the best thing about my senior year (if not the only good thing about it). None of the other girls I had my eye on in the past would have improved me the way Kristi has... in just three weeks of dating for that matter! For example, I wrote a nice note to my English teacher last week when a student was giving her a hard time. But I wouldn’t have even thought about it if I hadn’t gotten a note from my girl buddy. It was a great example to follow, and because of her, I made someone else’s day.
To sum it all up, I learned how to be patient and why it’s important. The “how” is simple: just pray. You’ll likely lose something you hold dear to your heart, but God probably won’t tell you that He doesn’t want patience from you. The “why” is a pretty simple concept, though it can be a tough pill to swallow. God has a plan for every single one of us, and we don’t know what it is until it’s over. Sometimes, when things don’t go the way we planned, we need to just trust that it’s God’s way of making room for something even better.
In Minnesota last night, a bridge on I-35 collapsed over the Mississippi River. Nobody could avoid the fall... whoever was on the bridge at the time was lucky to see anything ever again. Something similar happened in eastern Oklahoma about 5 years ago over Memorial Day weekend.
On a VeggieTales episode called “The Toy that Saved Christmas,” a toy and some cute little penguins were able to save Bob the Tomato, Larry the Cucumber, Junior Asparagus, and Wallie P. Nezzer from falling off the broken bridge to Pugslyville. Makes some people wish that penguins were native to downtown Minneapolis or rural Oklahoma, you know?
Everyone who grew up in a Baptist church has heard the bridge illustration before, so I won’t even dive into making Jesus look like a short little penguin or a Buzzsaw Louie. But the bridge and penguins and shop-tool-armed toys are useless to someone who doesn’t know Jesus... at least in this illustration. It’s our duty to share Jesus with people who haven’t met him yet, and Ezekiel 3 says that we will be held accountable for the opportunities we pass up to do so.
I’m running out of creative intros and it’s only part 2. Without further ado, let’s roll.
1. Smile 2. Spoken Word Quite simply, a friend that never says anything encouraging isn’t a friend. Therefore, a huge part of compassion is centered around the words we speak. I sat down recently and made a list of my favorite qualities of my best friends. One of the first things I listed was encouragement during good times. A “Good job, man!” following a perfect shot in basketball. Telling someone how well they did after their news interview. Even just thanking someone can be pretty big.
It’s also critical to use uplifting words when times are rough. In 7th grade, I tried out for the basketball team, gave it my best, and failed miserably. To put the word “miserably” into perspective, 30 people tried out for 24 spots (3 teams of 8). The best 8 players made the gold team, the next 8 made blue team, and the next 8 made white. Out of the remaining 6, 3 were told they would be used as backups. After all of that, there were three left over... including me. When Dad picked me up after try-outs, I anticipated “That’s too bad, but maybe next year.” But what he said to me instead was that even though the coaches think I’m one of the three worst guys that tried out, I still tried out, and therefore he was proud of me. Even four and a half years later it still upsets me that I have such a lack of basketball talent no matter how hard I try, but if it weren’t for my dad and his words, depression would have set in.
By the way, while we’re on the topic of kind words, happy birthday to Kristin, this blog’s top commenter!
What makes us effective as Christians? There are a number of different vital things such as staying in the Bible and being able to confront spiritual battles. But compassion is central. What makes compassion? That’s what I plan to answer in this series.
1. Smile I don’t literally mean you have to smile all the time. Barbie dolls smile all the time. Barbies creep me out, man. You don’t have to be a Barbie. Please don’t be a freaking Barbie. Actually, that’s not a request, that’s an order. Have you ever had one of those days where nothing seemed to go right until someone smiled at you? I have. If you had one of those days and nobody smiled for you, please understand that I am not trying to rub it in your smiling Barbie face. When I describe compassion as smiling, I mean in the context of smiling for someone who has had a bad day. That’s one way to make someone’s day... show your happy face.
But not like on the movie Elf. Okay for Will Ferrell. Not okay for you.
And spelling compassion with 5 S’s as a corny joke. Okay for me. Not okay for you.
My favorite board game in the world is undoubtedly Yahtzee. I’m not necessarily the best at it, though I usually do well. It’s a game of chance, but it requires a lot of skill. I have absolutely no control over what dice I roll. Maybe I’ll roll something bad, like a 1, 2, 4, 5 and 6. No points there. I could get something like a full house or small straight, which is quite good. If I’m really lucky, I might get five matching dice on the first throw. But no matter what I roll, there is strategy involved. Even the most pitiful rolls can be turned into a ton of points. And even if they can’t, then there’s always next time.
It works the same in life, and I’m not talking about the one created by Milton-Bradley. Nobody will get something perfect every time. Some people will never get the set of dice they want. But the dice we roll won’t be what will count when we die. It will be what we did with those dice. “Bad dice” could be something like losing a grandmother to cancer. That can be scored under either “complain about the unfairness of life” or “be grateful for my new step-grandmother.”
Everything that happens is part of God’s plan, whether it’s good or bad at first. Being upset is okay, but it is downright stupid to let obstacles get in the way of being an effective Christian.
Final exams are just around the corner. In just a couple of weeks, I’ll be a senior, and my colleague Justin will be a graduate. A spoil that juniors and seniors (and not FISH) get to enjoy is exemptions... which, in Spanish, is called “no tu takea el examo finalo iffen tu hava grados buenos.” Yeah, man. Would you believe that I’m exempt from the Spanish exam? That’s because I take German, not Spanish.
That has only one thing to do with anything in this post. And that’s my rundown sense of humor. It’s what I’m presenting in the “talent” show tomorrow night, which will be the first Wednesday night for Matt as our new youth minister. Hmm... what a great way for me to make a first impression. Share my lacking comedy style with 50 other kids. But I guess if I can share it with the world on the Internet, sharing it with 50 teenagers who already know me should be a breeze.
This goes back to my post called Representing. You never get a second chance at a first impression. Unless it’s with a really old person. But in most cases, we need to be aware of who we’re making first impressions on. Any time you’re around new people, you’re making first impressions. In short, make them count.
I am a pretty normal American... at least in the sense that I usually mute the TV during commercials. However, every so often, there is a commercial that I absolutely have to hear. One of these elite few that have risen to the top is this BP ad with the dancing babies. It’s just so random! And random impresses me.
This happens in the social world as well. We shun almost everyone around us... but the few people who have the same ethnic, religious, social, or even financial backgrounds as we do get a lot more attention. It’s perfectly okay to not be best friends with every Jimmithy on the block. We both understand that.
But what I see too much of in school is a social heirarchy. Of course, there’s the “de facto segregation” that we learned about in US History, meaning that segregation will always exist on some level. And it’s fine to make friends only with people that have common values. What isn’t okay is when Jimmithy doesn’t deserve help picking up the books he dropped because he’s poor and smells funny.
I don’t know anyone named Jimmithy. But we all know someone who we’ve treated like a Jimmithy. Try to make a conscious habit of taking time to be a B’tilda to all the Jimmithies you notice during the course of the day. B’tilda is a nice person. B’tilda bought her mom twelvety flowers for Easter Claus. In short, B’tilda is who you want to be. Say hey, and make the day a little better... baby.
As I was watching the Mavericks a few nights ago, I couldn’t help but notice a sense of urgency in the Seattle home crowd. I’ve known for a while that there was a looming possibility of Oklahoma City laying claim to the SuperSonics in a year or two. What I didn’t stop to think about was how the Seattle fan base would react. I, being a native Okie, was excited that a legitimate sports team would land in my state. But now I can’t help but feel a little sorry for the fans in the Sonics’ home of 40 years.
A lot of people do the same thing to their friends that the SuperSonics might do to Seattle. They stick together... at first. But when someone who seems better comes along, the relationship dissolves. Sure, Oklahoma City and the Sonics thrive on the new deal. But what about the original friend, Seattle? Seattle would be left without an NBA team for a very long time.
We often do this to our friends unknowingly. This can happen in dating... I’ve been on the Seattle end of that one. It happens when we start thinking about our own interests and lose consciousness of how we’re affecting our friends. Of course, Oklahoma City won’t share the SuperSonics with Seattle the way it shared the Hornets with New Orleans. But people can be (and, therefore, should be) open to making new friends without doing so at the expense of old friends.
Virginia Tech University was represented in the worst way today. An outstanding college gained global attention when a student slayed many of his fellow Hokies as well as himself. It’s not Virginia Tech’s fault that this happened, but they will naturally receive all the negative attention for it.
Every second of every day is spent representing someone. At a football game, we represent the Dallas Cowboys. Or Frisco High School. Or Oklahoma State. At the grocery store, we represent Mom and Dad. Some places we go, we represent our city, state, or even country. And as long as we live, we represent God and Jesus. I honestly believe that if we were more conscious of our decisions all the time, Christians would have a much better image among non-believers. But some people will only see one version of Jesus, and that version will be a complete shame to Christians. Don’t let yourself be the bad version someone sees. Strive to be the best “Jesus” you can be. The first people that invited Billy Graham to church could easily have been a “bad Jesus” for him. They weren’t. Look at the results.
Wherever you go, be the best person you can be so that you can represent well.
How do you heal a broken relationship? There are a number of valid ways. In most cases, the best way to fix a problem is to eliminate what caused it. And what I figured out in Life Groups last night was that many friendships are harmed when someone is too stubborn to apologize. Love does not mean never having to say you’re sorry. Hollywood was wrong again. What a shock.
I decided to bring on one of the biggest undertakings of my life last night. I made a list of all my friends that I was at odds with.* Then I went down the list and wrote letters to most of the people on it. I chose to write instead of speak for three reasons.
Writing allows you to say everything uninterrupted
The things that need to be said most are hard to say face-to-face
I have insanely awesome handwriting that I love showing off
So far, I feel really good about it. It could have been my good breakfast and great overall start to the day that made today feel so good, but I’d rather believe that it was because I put my plan into action. Either my friendships will be repaired, or they will identify themselves as unnecessary.
My advice to you the reader: do NOT watch Love Story. Ever.
March 15th was my 17th birthday. It was also the day my driver’s license expired. For my birthday, my aunt and uncle gave me an OSU shirt and a matching hat. The state of Texas gave me a ridiculous wait in line at the DMV only to be rejected because I don’t have $24 and verification of enrollment with me. Mom and Dad gave me a trip to Family Christian Stores to pick out some CDs I want. The state of Texas gave me a week of riding the bus to school.
Some gifts are better than others. Given the choice between a Falling Up CD and a week of sharing my ride to school with a bunch of midget freshmen, the hard part of the choice would be choosing between Dawn Escapes or Crashings. But what about anything of this world versus eternal life? Eternal life is the butt-kickin-est gift a person could ever receive. And you don’t have to make a special trip to Best Buy and Family Christian Stores to get it... or to give it, for that matter.
There are plenty of people out there who would love nothing more than to laugh at you for being a Christian. This group of people is at the Number 3 slot on the list of people who need prayer*. Take a hint and pray for them veraciously. Not everyone will soften up to you, but at least you can get them ready for someone else. And, in many scenarios, God will open the door for you to evangelize that person.
He might even help you figure where I came up with the title for this post.
It sucks being smart. No college in the country seems to fathom the fact that I have my heart set on only one college: Oklahoma State. Yet, because of my “outstanding academic achievement,”* I’ve gotten solicited college mail from almost every state. Has anyone heard of Simon’s Rock College of Bard? Sorry, guys, there’s no point in spending actual money to go somewhere in Massachusetts. Friggin’ liberal state. They probably have abortion free with Big Macs or AOL membership.
As Christians, we can’t just assume that we always have an audience that wants to hear us talk about Jesus. It’s like getting married. You don’t go to a part of town where lots of singles live and just start asking people to marry you. That’s almost as bad as the idea of The Bachelor. You have to find a person and get to know them. Then, when you feel like they’re ready, you talk about Christ. Otherwise, they’ll just treat it like an information overload and stop paying attention. Just like how I always toss the information-packed letters I receive from CalTech*.
Talk about God. But don’t cut to the chase unless you know for a fact that it is necessary. But don’t take forever, either. Timing is everything and more. And if you don’t know when the timing is right, pray. And don’t just pray about timing. Pray about what words to use. And if you don’t get exactly what you’re looking for, at least you’ve planted a seed.
While in the process of adding all my old posts (10/05-6/06) to this blog, I realized that I’m not as screwed up as I sometimes feel like I am. It makes me very happy that I have this blog to look back and reflect on.
Not only do I see that I’m better than I thought, I also see that, in some ways, I’m worse. Back in June, I felt compelled to read my Bible every day. Although I still read it frequently, I’m reminded that I’ve let the fire from Camp WOW wear away.
I also see how much I’ve matured. Obviously, since it’s been 17 months since I started this blog, you would expect me to grow up a little bit. But most people don’t get a chance to look back on their own lives and see progress. And it is for that reason that I encourage everyone to start journaling or blogging. What nobody realizes is that we don’t always have to go to others for help in life. We can usually learn from how we corrected our own past mistakes. We truly are our own best teachers in life.
I hate sitting down with nothing to do. I hate it to the point that, after I arrive in class, I always set my stuff down and just roam the halls until right before the bell rings. Today I did this right before German class. When I got back to the classroom, I found one of my classmates flipping through my Bible. One of the story titles that caught his attention was “The Rape of Tamar” (in 2 Samuel 13). His eyes got all big and wide as he attempted to comprehend the fact that the Bible actually contains stories of rape.
That’s when I realized that I wasn’t dealing with a church-goer. I could have easily figured it out, but now I see that he really needs a Christian influence and a good church. The good thing is that he isn’t too far gone... if you know what I mean. This just spells out O-P-P-O-R-T-U-N-I-T-Y.
In church, we’ve been taking what we’re calling the “4x4 Challenge...” where we identify four people that don’t go to church and invite them to our church. The challenge was intended for the adults, but I seriously doubt God will have any objection to high schoolers bringing friends. Heh. “Hey, God, can I bring some people to you?” “Noooo... you brought me some last week.” Yeah, that would happen.
I know that the 4x4 Challenge is a Preston Ridge Baptist Church thing, but it is obviously okay for all people and all churches. So right here I will officially challenge every single one of my readers to bring at least one person to a church within the next month. Ready, set, go!
Um, right after you get off this website, you can go...
Or, on, like, Sunday... whichever works, just do it.
My mom likes to keep things that remind her of milestones in my life. She has my learner’s permit, and she’s also a lock to hold onto my paper license when my picturized one comes in the mail this week. Miscellaneous papers that I wrote for school, awards I won for Math/Science Team competitions in middle school... the list goes on. So, today, when I made my first solo trip to fill my Malibu named Tony* with gasoline this evening, I thought I would save the receipt for her to store in her special box for me.
Only problem was, the pump I filled up at had a printer malfunction. It said on the convenient* little screen on the pump that I could go inside for a receipt. So I go inside, expecting to tell the cashier “Hey, man, I filled at Pump #1 and I need a receipt... can ya hook me up?” and the guy would be like, “Sure, boss,” and he’d give me this nice printout that looks like the receipt I would have gotten outside. Well, no. Instead, he goes, “How much gas did you put in?” So I told him it was, like, 11 gallons, and that I didn’t know for sure how many gallons exactly, but that it came out to $21 even. So this guy writes on a piece of paper in doctor handwriting “Feb 3 07 pump 1 $21.00” and something that may have been his signature... or a picture of a horse... with five legs. Yeah, a five-legged horse. That’s what it was.
I’m sure that Mom won’t mind not having this memory of my first gas trip, but it’s amazing that something as small as a printer malfunction can lead to sacrificing something like a priceless memory. Okay, so a piece of weirdly smooth paper that thanks me for buying my gas from Albertson’s and tells me to try their groceries* is relatively trivial, but sometimes small things lead to big disasters. Like one sarcastic comment can ruin a person’s week. Last year, I was having a bad day when some little midget freshman asked me where I got my shirt... which said “COLORADO” in size, like, a thousand font. Agitated that someone would ask such a doofie question, and trying to maintain my reputation as a comedian, I responded by saying Hawaii with the Napoleon Dynamite voice and facial expressions. Well, that was enough to put the little 14-year-old* through the roof. He made the intelligent choice to punch me in the back of the head right in front of the assisstant principal, earning him a week of suspension.
Okay, what he did was wrong and can’t be blamed completely on me, but I could have avoided it by just doing what Jesus would have done. Then everyone could see me not doing the easy thing (laughing at an idiotic question) but rather doing the hard thing (helping this kid with his social skills). I often say that I don’t have enough opportunities to show God. So do a lot of us. But in reality, we get chances all the time. We just tend to let them go by because we weren’t thinking about our choices.
Sorry, guys, I’m all out of these cool segways. You’ll just have to settle for a post this week. Aww.
1. We often try to skip the part where we’re “just friends” 2. Physical relationships aren’t necessarily a sign of real love 3. Dating frequently results in two-person cliques 4. Dating is too focused on the short-term 5. We usually leave out what’s important
Once again, I have to tip my hat to Justin and Brittney. They are quite serious about each other, but they don’t seem to let that take each other away from God. Justin still reads his Bible all the time, and Brittney... well, she goes to Baylor, the best Southern Baptist school in the country... I’m positive that she is still focusing on the Lord.
At my church, we have a special emphasis on accountability partners. My philosophy is that if your boyfriend/girlfriend is your accountability partner, you’re probably doing okay. However, in most cases, I don’t see this... even in Christian relationships. A boyfriend and a girlfriend who can put God first in everything they do together, generally speaking, will have no trouble at all with any of these, because everything should fall into place.
But it doesn’t even stop at religion. One of my friends from English claims frequently that he couldn’t do his homework because he was at his girlfriend’s house. Whether that’s true or not, it is a problem either way. For him, it means that either his girlfriend is a distraction from school work, or she’s an excuse that makes him sound that much cooler to his classmates.
To tell the truth, I still do like a few girls. I know how hypocritical it makes me sound, especially after all these reasons not to date. So I’m here to say that dating is okay. What it all comes down to is attitude and self-control. Maintain both and everything should work out okay. Let one slip away and fall down go boom.
1. We often try to skip the part where we’re “just friends” 2. Physical relationships aren’t necessarily a sign of real love 3. Dating frequently results in two-person cliques 4. Dating is too focused on the short-term
I have little doubt that some of you are wondering what it is with me and dating. I’ve gotten complaints that “I’m saying that dating is wrong altogether; what about when it’s time to marry?” Well, face it, high schoolers are shallow.
You heard me. Shallow.
In high school, our perception of dating is slightly different. I think that if I were to be caught walking down the hallways of Frisco High School holding hands with a hot redhead girl, my reputation points would go through the roof! All the guys would be like, “Dude, your girlfriend is awesome! Nice job, homey!” And all the girls would tell my girlfriend that she “looks so cute with me.” One of the counselors at FHS handed me this bit of advice, back when I was less philosophical about women:
You’re a smart, nice kid. You don’t have a girlfriend right now because girls are [mainly] thinking about how each boy would affect their social lives. ... But when you get into college, women will be thinking more about marriage. Their standards will shift from favoring the best-looking men to the intelligent, benevolent ones.
„Auf Englisch, bitte!“ Okay. Right now, we aren’t too concerned about who will be good for us in the long run. We think about who sometimes makes us laugh during class. We think about the girl that looks good in pink. You know where I’m going with this.
So, no, I don’t believe that dating is wrong in high school. I believe that it is wrong to make spur-of-the-moment decisions when choosing a date-mate. Instead, try taking your time and finding the one that’s best for your needs rather than your wants.
We take many of the things in our lives for granted, and most of the time we don’t even realize that we’re doing it. Like that nice car you got, or the newest XBox or Playstation, or whatever game that came out, or the house you live in... You take for granted all those toys you got for Christmas... Did you know that most kids don’t even get a penny worth? You take for granted the books you have, the clothes you have, and even the food you get. Did you know that most kids only get maybe 1/10 of what you get? We take advantage of these things without thinking of their meaning in our lives or what it would be like without them.
OK, now how do I tie this in with language...hmm...oh right. We even take the language, or what we say for granted also... Ok, wait... “How do we do that?”
How often do we think about the words we speak, the way they sound or even what they really mean? Just like we use the things in our life without thinking about them, we use words without thinking. We have phrases that we say that really don’t sound nice at all, when we stop to think about it.
In conclusion, I think we need to slow down. Let’s think about the things that God has blessed us with and appreciate them more. And, let’s stop to think about the words we say too and make sure that what we say is really what we want other people to hear from us and what we want to hear from others.
Just a quick recap: Last week, I execrated* the idea of “getting too physical” in a realationship. Time for week three.
1. We often try to skip the part where we’re “just friends” 2. Physical relationships aren’t necessarily a sign of real love 3. Dating frequently results in two-person cliques
For purposes of the story, I will refer to two of my friends only as Jack and Jill. They did not go up any hill, but they did go out for a while.
Jack had been one of my better friends for a long time. Jill? I had known her for a little while; not any shorter than Jack had, though. (Those of you who read my last post can already point out their first error.) They met each other and, for a while, seemed “cute”* together. Ask me where they went wrong.
Hey, I’m glad you asked. As soon as they started going out, my friendship with Jack deteriorated... quickly. He treated me with more sarcasm than usual. He would eventually stop talking to me. And as for Jill... she avoided me, thinking it would be better for her social life if Jack was the only male presence. This started her down the path to the dark side... and by that I mean that she slowly began cutting herself off from almost every friendship. And this is what I see too frequently, and it’s why I have decided strongly against having a girlfriend. I don’t trust myself to keep all my other friendships healthy while maintaining a dating relationship. Oh, sure, I probably could, but I’m already happy the way I am.
The bottom line: If you think you can have a dating relationship without causing other good friendships to wither away like the grass, go for it. But the minute you catch yourself going down a path that leads you away from vital friends, break it off immediately.
Now, in the midst of all this hopeless negativism, comes the part where I brag on my best friend, Justin... an example of what is good in a teenage dating relationship. He’s been going out with his girlfriend for almost a year, and it’s quite obvious that they like each other as more than just friends. The main difference? His girlfriend is open to being friends with anyone that he wants to hang out with, and vice-versa. I hate sounding like a crony, but every time I think of what it would be like to have a girlfriend, I think of how much I want to be like them. Kudos, Justin and Brittney.
And now it’s time for Dating Advice With Ryan: the part of the blog where Ryan comes out and gives dating advice.
Last Wednesday, I spoke against cutting to the chase. This week, it’s us against the world. What I say in the next few paragraphs will completely shun what the world promotes as OK.
1. We often try to skip the part where we’re “just friends” 2. Physical relationships aren’t necessarily a sign of real love
Once again, I’m gonna have to quote Joshua Harris’s book:
Just because lips have met doesn’t mean hearts have joined. And just because two bodies are drawn to each other doesn’t mean two people are right for each other. A physical relationship doesn’t equal love. ... Sadly, many Christian dating relationships reflect [the wrong] mindset. (Harris 36)
People who follow the wrong mindset here are usually pretty easy to spot at my high school. They’re the ones holding hands, kissing, and just flat-out mauling each other in the hallways. You know what they’re really doing? Showing off.
Television and movies deserve a large helping of the “blame soup” on this one... if ya smell what I’m cookin’. TV shows and movies let us know that the “treasure protector” is in love with “the mean Declaration lady” by showing them have a little make-out moment.
But what most teenagers -- or, rather, most people -- don’t seem to grasp is that they only portray it this way because, come on, it’s a movie... how else can they show it? So, what do we do? We kiss and all that just like the movies because we think that there’s no other way to show complete strangers that we have girlfriends. And this will, with little doubt, lead to lust.
Lust can corrupt a person. Lust makes you shallow. Shallowness causes you to make spur-of-the-moment decisions when looking for a girlfriend rather than looking to what really matters. I’m not saying that the hottest girl in school isn’t right for anyone, but I can guarantee that she’s not the right person to start with, no matter what she does for your reputation.
I will once again end this with my little disclaimer: I’m not saying that having a girlfriend is wrong. What I’m saying is that too many people make choices in high school dating relationships that lead to unnecessary pain and heartbreak. And I won’t force anyone to follow this example, but I personally will try to stop thinking about women and just enjoy the gift of being single.
Some of us like to take part in the ancient ritual known to us as New Year’s Resolutions. Every year from 2002 to 2006, I resolved to have a girlfriend sometime by the end of the year. I started hitting on girls, and most of them responded in a way I didn’t want. I’ve gotten the good old-fashioned easy letdown, the punch in the gut, and everything in between. This year, I resolved not to rush into having a girlfriend, and, thanks to a book by Joshua Harris, I have perfectly legit reasoning for such.
1. We often try to skip the part where we’re “just friends”
This zinger probably nailed just about every person in my teenage audience. Even if you have never had a girlfriend, you’ve probably at least looked at a girl you didn’t know very well and thought of her as a potential girlfriend.
The two most common mistakes in this category would begin with the one I just described. The nubmer two most common mistake is along the lines of: “Well, I’ve known her for x number of days. Now I can ask her out.” I’ll be honest; I have been more than guilty of both.
The main difference between being friends and going out, as written by Harris, boils down to one paragraph:
The premise of dating is “I’m attracted to you; therefore, let’s get to know each other.” The premise of friendship, on the other hand, is “We’re interested in the same things; let’s enjoy these common interests together.” If, after developing a friendship, romantic attraction forms, that’s an added bonus. Harris, Joshua. I Kissed Dating Goodbye. Oregon: Multnomah Publishers, Inc., 1997. (Harris 35)
This philosophy alone makes it sound like waiting awhile makes romance okay. But don’t make the rookie mistake of trying to be “just friends” with that cute girl in your 4th period class* with the ultimate goal of going out with her. You may end up with a friend, but for the wrong reason. You’ll be susceptible to accusations of rushing into things. When you think you’re ready, you run the risk of ruining a perfectly good friendship by adding the awkward factor into it. And even if she says yes, the risk is still there, because in high school, breakups are all but inevitable. You couldn’t make teenage heartbreak suck more if you put a Hoover label on it.
One thing needs to be clear: it’s not wrong to have a girlfriend (unless you happen to be female). It becomes a problem when we let ourselves make irresponsible decisions, which most teenagers try to do. You just have to know what’s right and wrong in a high school dating relationship.
This is the first little lesson in my series of 5. I’m gonna try to do my best to add another one each Wednesday night during the month of January. Without further ado, adieu.
Cornbread just may be one of the nastiest foods known to man. It could have been used to win the Civil War; throwing it at the North or feeding it to the North... either way, we’d’ve had ’em* beat. However, it is a fun word to yell at younger boy scouts, a fact that has earned me the nickname “cornbread.”
Over Thanksgiving, when I was in Tulsa, my little cousin heard about this and decided to use his Darth Sidious voice to tell me that I “don’t know the power of the cornbread.” (I even went so far as to find other places to hide the word.)
My point in all of this is that my cousin loves me. (I also mentioned this in a previous post.) He seems to all but idolize me, which--as great as my friends are--is a rarity in my life. And there is no obligation for him to love me. Just like we have no obligation to love God. He gave us free will so that we wouldn’t be friggin’ puppets. Based on the way my little cousin makes me feel with his affection toward me, I think that God must be ecstatic to know that we really love Him given the choice not to.
So, how do you think He feels when we don’ spread His love, therefore condemning His creations to hell? I’ll admit, I used to be a bad influence on my friends, but with that in mind... it’s, in essence, robbing God to not spread His Message. That mindset has helped me avoid sin more than once... a little tip for some of you who might need it.
By the way, anyone who read and liked my cornbread quotes is welcome to leave more for me in a comment.
Ahh, one of* the greatest Christmas movies of all time.
In church today, we watched a scene from the movie Elf. The scene we watched depicted Will Ferrell’s character, “Buddy,” inside a New York City store preparing for Christmas. When Buddy hears word that Santa is coming to visit the store, he gets extremely excited. He knows the real Santa personally, so he can’t help but tell everyone how overjoyed he is to see him again.
Hold up, wait a minute, put a little tie-into-Christianity in it!
This man was absolutely nuts about seeing Santa! He was jump-up-and-down-and-scream crazy!
The only time I’ve ever gone that insane was in 7th grade, when my belovéd Oklahoma State Cowboys downed the OU Sooners 38-28. Let me tell you, I was a nut job during that game, especially when OSU jumped ahead 35-6. Following the game, I danced in the street in front of my uncle’s house, spiking my football and shouting the final score for almost an hour.
The mention of the name Jesus does not incite these reactions anymore... if it ever did. He’s the greatest person ever to walk this sorry Earth... and He’s coming back again one day, possibly in my lifetime! This is more exciting than seeing Santa or watching Oklahoma State Cowboy domiNation. My youth minister’s wish seems to be that we will have as good of a relationship with God as Buddy did with Santa Claus and as I do with the stinkingest football team in the Big 12 (besides Baylor). When we think of Jesus’s second coming, we need to prepare.
There are some things that will never go away. That is why we have to be careful about what we say and do, especially when it may affect others around us... Whether we are joking or not we have to watch what we say. We have been talking about this in LifeGroups for several weeks. In case you didn’t know LifeGroups is a program that the youth group of Preston Ridge Baptist Church is holding for youth on Wednesday nights.
When I was in middle school I was having a hard time with keeping my grades up, but no matter how low they got my parents still encouraged me, but what if they hadn’t, what if they had not encouraged me, and said “You’re right Justin, you can’t do it?” I would have been torn to shreds. But they didn’t, they kept encouraging me even though I probably didn’t believe them at the time, and they even paid for me to go to Sylvan, and with their encouragement and Sylvan’s encouragement and willingness to show me that I could do whatever I wanted to do, I finally realized that I could. I was on the line and one push towards discouragement would have lost the battle and I would never have known what I could do. I only tell you this to encourage you to watch what you say and do. One joke, and even one word can make someone feel like they’re worth nothing.
If one person tells you, that you are smart, and one person tells you that you aren’t, who are you going to believe? We are usually more quick to believe the bad things that we are told. We need to hear at least 5 positive things to counter only 1 negative. As a youth group, we are learning to be the ones to build each other up. Even if we take back something we say, or remove a post, it is hard to forget what was said when it was negative. Relationships get hurt and it takes a lot of positive reinforcement to overcome the negative.
As Christians we want to be especially careful about how we act and relate toward the people around us. We need to build each other up in a way that is pleasing to Christ and in a way that sets a good example to those around us.
These LifeGroup lessons have been teaching us how sarcasm and negative comments can hurt friendships, especially when it goes so far that it becomes “normal” and “comfortable.” I think that while hearing the lesson, some of us didn’t realize how much it applied to us and how much we were like the example of what not to do and how not to treat each other. Let’s all work on encouraging those around us and setting the tone for our youth group to be one that is building everyone up instead of tearing them down. We get enough negative from the world around us. Let’s not do it to ourselves.
Okay, here are some interesting questions I’ve wondered in the past 24 hours. Three posts for the price of one!*
How did my youth minister lose an iPod Video??
Do I have a chance to get into Texas Tech*?
And, my personal favorite...
HOW DID I END UP WITH A DATE TO HOMECOMING WITHOUT KNOWING IT??
So, here are my explanations of all three, consolidated into one post. Amazing!
1.) How Simon Keizer Lost His iPod Video Interesting story. He says that even he doesn’t know for sure how he lost it, but it makes me think... is there any excuse to lose something that valuable? There is hardly anything more valuable to me than my iPod nano. I don’t know how I would get along without that thing by my side for more than an hour or two (unless I’m in class)! The things I value most, however, are my friends. They can get lost, too... to the evil hands of Satan. They are way too valuable to waste like that.
2.) How I Could Get Into Texas Tech Heh, heh, heh... I probably couldn’t. My parents wouldn’t let me go to Tech if my alternative is Oklahoma State, which is much cheaper for us. I’m just going to speak with their representative to get out of class (but don’t tell anyone).
3.) The Homecoming Thing (which is probably all you want to know about, anyway) I wish I knew exactly how this happened. The three girls in this story (Girl A, Girl B, and Girl C) could be scheming on me for something I said at church recently, but I can’t be too sure. Anyway, Girls A and C approached me today when I was headed to 4th period and asked if I wanted to take Ms. B. to homecoming. (I had no idea she even liked me!!) I said I’d think about it, which I actually did this time. Seriously, I haven’t had a girlfriend worth mentioning since elementary school level! I couldn’t not think about it, if you know what I mean. Do you think we ever get so caught up in what we want and how we can’t have it that we miss our opportunities to get it on a silver platter*? Something to think about there...
And so concludes this post. I’ll be back later with more on this developing girl-related story. Reporting live, this is This Reporter.
Dang, that summer went by waay too fast!! I still managed to do a lot, the highlight being a car trip to Canada with two brothers who don’t know the meaning of quiet.
Well, maybe they know the meaning, they just didn’t apply it. Whatever, technicality gets me a lot. Today was the first day of school, which most of my audience probably knows by now. Man, the “first day” stories flow in abundance! Here are a select few I’ve picked out just for ya’ll...
First period, PreAP Pre-Calculus... my teacher (Mrs. E.) made me laugh out loud, a feat that even Leno fails to achieve sometimes. I discover that she also speaks German, my “other” language. Ihre Klasse macht viel Spaß!
Second period, US History... My teacher is amused by my sense of humor when she calls roll... the last two people before me went by something other than what their real name is, so when she called out “Ryan” I made a point out of the fact that I go by Ryan. (Tomorrow I’m gonna tell someone to pronounce it ree-AHN.)
Third period, AP Computer Science II (as if I wasn’t geeky enough)... we learn Java instead of VB, which is what I know really well from CS1. Geez, the teacher won’t even allow us to eat Skittles or Doritos or drink Cokes or listen to iPods. I miss Mr. Benschneider (my CS1 teacher) so much!!
Fourth period, early release... I spent fourth period in my mom’s classroom taking attendance papers to the office... or “doing her bidding” as I explained to my Geometry teacher from last year. She was amused.
So I guess I started the school year on the right foot, although tomorrow I have four other class periods to report on... I get to be a lab assisstant* for my former Chemistry teacher, then I go to PreAP Physics*, then English III*, then PreAP German III*.
They say that nobody gets a second chance at a first impression, but the good (or bad) effects of a first impression can be wiped away like Expo markers from a whiteboard. I hope my first impression with my new teachers is a good solid one. However, nobody ever made a “first impression” on God. Nobody ever had to. The impression that God has of us is found in our hearts*. No matter how good or bad we act, God knows our hearts, so we have nothing to hide. And if we have nothing to hide from Him, what must we hide from the world?
So August 14th of 2006 is behind us now. Life continues, but how it continues is up to us. It’s our duty to be who God intended us to be. Show the world what God wanted to show when He created you. And even if you execrate school as much as I do, it’s one of the best places to be yourself. See? I can be myself anywhere... a nerd who knows how to correctly use the word execrate.
I get to visit my cousins from my mom’s side of the family almost every month. I live in the Dallas area, and they live generally around Tulsa. So we get to see each other frequently. But on my dad’s side, I have two uncles... one that lives in Montgomery Alabama, and one that lives near Seattle. I don’t ever get to see them; I rarely get to see them both at the same time. They are here for the weekend, and it’s the first time I’ve been with both uncles at the same time since my Grandpa died when I was 7.
That’s over 9 years.
They have never been to Dallas, but they will have been there as of later today. We get to go to the Reunion Tower and the Sixth Floor Museum. I have to wonder... why do we only go there when we have guests here?
It’s because we want to make a good impression, of course. Some losers try to do that with God. You know, the title “Faulty Jeans” is symbolic that God doesn’t care what we look like. Essentially, trying to impress God is the same thing. He won’t fall for it. It’s an external... He’s just going to see right through it.* It happens more frequently than you probably notice.
Why???Why??Why? Well, I am not exactly sure why I am up this late, but I guess I just felt the urge to let you know what I am thinking.
Lots of people think about many different things like, what they are going to wear tomorrow (which I am not thinking about, cause tomorrow is a long time away), the next car they want, the next game that’s going to come out, school supplies, the internet, soccer or sports in general, and pretty much everything else the world has to offer... But, have you ever thought about what God has to offer???
What God has to offer is far greater than anything the world has to offer, far more amazing than anything you will ever see in your life, far more lasting than anything you will ever think about.
Have you ever had a hard time being accepted, because of what you have done in the past? Or what you look like? Or how you act? Have you ever wished for a friend that won’t care about any of it?
Have you ever loved anyone so much that you would die for them? Think about it! I mean die for them? Wouldn’t you want to have someone love you so much that he/she would die for you?
Isn’t that what Jesus did? God loves you so much that he sent his only son, Jesus Christ, to die for you, and not only that, Jesus could have stopped at any time, but he didn’t. Do you know why? Because He loves you so much, that he died on a cross with nails hammered through his hands and feet. Now, to have that everlasting love, you have to accept what he did for you and ask for him to come and live in your heart, not just live in it, but own it. When you truly believe and decide to live for Him alone, your life will start to change, and you will feel so much better about your self. God hates sin, but he loves sinners... We are ALL SINNERS, but He loves us anyway... He loves us anyway, what a great feeling... God doesn’t care how we look, or what we have done in the past, no matter what you have done, if you accept him into you heart, He will accept you. I can guarantee it. He WILL accept you.
Yesterday was interesting. I got my first [legal] driving experience, which was just a couple of “victory laps” around a vacant parking lot and then a mile drive home from there.
Funny story... on Sunday, my 3-year-old cousin who was staying at my house didn’t want to leave... I told him that he couldn’t stay with me because I had to go learn how to drive... he just said, “Oh, I’ll just sit in back!”
But an event from yesterday that I did not enjoy was being elevated to the rank of Senior Patrol Leader in my scout troop. Yes, it’s something I have wanted for a long time, but I never wanted to get it the way I did. My best friend from within the troop (Travis), who was our Senior Patrol Leader before, is moving to Illinois. As far as I care, that’s zero amount of fun for me. But why should I be whining? I lose one friend and keep the rest. Travis pretty much loses all his friends and has to make new ones in a small town where people would think of him as a stuck-up “rich kid...” which couldn’t be farther from the truth about him. I get to stay in a place that is familiar to me and where I have a solid reputation*. Travis, who is one of the most respected members of our troop, is going to have to start from scratch in a place that is new to him. I can only feel bad that he has to go through this, but I think he’ll be better for it than I was. When I moved from Tulsa to Frisco, I chose to be sour and rotten about it because I was under the strange dellusion that I could make my parents move us back to Oklahoma. I ended up hurting myself through that, and missed out on opportunities to enjoy life. But I think that Travis will do well and not be angry 24/7. I feel pretty optimistic for him.
Like I said, my friend total might be down by one, but I can’t help but feel that everything will be alright.
In other news, today is my parents’ 19th anniversary!
This past week seemed to go by so fast when I was in Mexico. The schedule for Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Monday was...
Wake up at 7:30-ish am.
Eat Breakfast at 8:00am.
Go to working outside in over hundred degree weather, moving brick, and rock, and iron, from one place to another, and doing some landscaping, from 9:00am to 11:30am.
Eat Lunch at 12:00 noon.
Then at 1:00pm, the kids come from their home to the mission for day camp.
Day Camp Schedule
We register the kids, give name tags and send them to their teams, which are set for them. (green, blue, yellow, or red)
Then all the teams go to the cafeteria, where they sing, memorize the verse of the week, show some team spirit, do a cheer, watch a movie.
At 2:00pm the kids have lunch. (which is regular time in Mexico to have lunch)
Then at 2:35pm two of the teams go and play soccer and play in the pool, while the other two teams would go do crafts.
At 2:55pm the teams would switch.
At 3:15pm the kids would change into a new set of clothes if they were wet from swimming, and go have a snack as the team leaders were calling out for 4 kids from each team (2 girls and 2 boys) to win a prize for something they did that day.
Then after they were done eating and all the prizes were handed out the kids would go home
After Day Camp
After day camp we ate dinner at 5:00pm and had some free time after that. We had our own worship time in the cafeteria which lasted a little over an hour, and then had more free time until we had to be in our room at 10:30pm or so. If you noticed in the second sentence of this post, I left out Sunday. That’s because it was different. The times we ate were about the same, but what we did was different. We attended a Spanish speaking baptist church for one hour, and then we went to the building next door and held a carnival. Now I went to this thinking we would only have a few games, and the kids would have some fun playing around. My Grandma proved me wrong; she had more games planned than I thought. The stuffed animals and toys that were donated to us were prizes for the kids who won the game or even got close to winning. I couldn’t count how many toys we had to give out. Not only did the kids have a blast, but the parents and adults did too. I thank all the people that donated to our cause and I wish that you all could have been there to see over 40 kids trying to walk away when it was over, with more toys than they could carry. Not one left with nothing; in fact not one left with fewer than 3 or 4 toys. The lady that lived at the mission was there, and when we went back to the mission, she talked with us over dinner, and said the kids thought it was “Christmas in July;” she also said that nothing like this was ever done before in that church, and that those kids walked away with more than they ever got on Christmas Day. Thank the Lord for the opportunity to go and do something like that. The Mission trip was an awesome experience, and I can’t wait to go back next year and see how those kids changed and do it all over again.
I am a little “HI” on the word “YEP!” right now, if you can’t tell by reading all the comments, but anyways. Let me get to the point. This was not my idea, it was Ryan’s, so don’t expect me to type as good... or have anything as good to type... as Ryan does. YEP! I am Justin, the one joining with Ryan. Now you know. YEP! Hope this works Ryan.
Now that we have my best friend posting on this blog, who knows what will happen? You’ll notice that this is now “Christianity through the eyes of teenagers” instead of “Christianity through a teenager’s eyes.”
Now that the welcoming is done, let’s go live to the original post already in progress.
...ited for myself because in a matter of hours I get to see Rob Bell in person. Sweet. My infant cousin, Derek, will be there as well. His nickname among me, himself, and his 3-year-old brother, Grant, is “Little Dude.” That originated with Grant and I calling each other “Dude” a long time ago... back when you had to teach him how to be cute.
Grant really looks up to me as far as I know. More than once, I’ve heard stories about him asking his mom where “Dude” was. I feel so happy when I know that he loves me enough to not only ask where I am, but to call me by our little “special nickname” for each other. He apparently looks forward to seeing me and talking with me, and I look forward to each opportunity to spend time with him.
I think that that’s exactly the kind of relationship we should have with God. I’m not saying that you have to start off prayers with “Dear Big Dude” or finish them with “in Big Dude’s name, amen” or anything (although you’re welcome to if you want), I’m just saying that we should be spending enough time with God that it becomes something that we want to do 24/7.
Gosh, that sounds just like Rob Bell, doesn’t it? Can’t you just see it:
Oh, yeah.
Now I just have to wonder... why is it that this is my third consecutive post that has come after midnight?
It was the best of teams, it was the worst of teams. It was the 2-time Texas League Champions, it was the Colorado League’s 3-time last place team. It was my hometown Frisco Roughriders, it was my birthtown Tulsa Drillers. And they play each other tomorrow... or should I say later today?
For the record, just because I alluded to Dickens does NOT mean I enjoy his literature.
Back to the future-- I mean the original topic, which kinda takes place in the future-- who do I root for? I mean, I could keep my loyalty to the Drillers, who have been my favorite team since golly-knows-when, or I could go with the crowd and be a Riders guy. I mean, it’s the Minor League... who’s gonna drive 200+ miles to see the stinkin’ Drillers play on the road? Would I be the only Tulsa fan there?
But then again, is it really so bad to be rejected? Yeah, all my friends would call me crazy, but is that such a break from the ordinary? Not really. My uncle gave me some wise advice...
“Root for both and really confuse the people around you. Have fun.”
Didn’t the Bible say something about serving two masters?
I just want to know why the Frisco Roughriders felt that their bathrooms were so worthy of being on their website.
After all that rambling, we finally get to my point. People obsess over many different things; in the case of the Roughriders, it’s hiring an interior decorator for the Ladies’ room. But for people like me, it’s TV, PlayStation2, the Internet (surprise, surprise), and CORNBREAD. (You’ll have to ask someone from Troop 216 about that last one...) Rewind and pause at TV. I have a friend that knew how to not let TV corrupt his life. My best friend, Justin, does not watch television. I think that’s a rather good idea; I might try and wean off of the idiot box myself. I still gotta watch the news so I can keep up my political blog, and maybe Wheel of Fortune or Jeopardy now and then. And whatever OSU game is on; that’s important. I want to see a comment about what other people are doing to get rid of non-Christian obsessions. And then I can talk about it in my small group on Sunday night. Leave a comment, ready, set, go!
Here are the highlights from the past week that I will use to close out the first season of Faulty Jeans:
Now that my Mavs are in the Finals, I can truly say that good things do happen to teams I like. Game 1 tomorrow.
Camp WOW lives up to its name very well. Some great memories were made when I decided to sing Christmas songs in the shower. Other cool things:
I made a cool video slideshow that I will post in July (when it is more efficient to do so)
We watched Rob Bell videos for the sermons in the mornings... Rob Bell happens to be one of my favorite people on Earth
I became better and closer friends with Justin Venezio, which is something I’ve been wanting to be able to do for so long now
I rekindled my will to read my Bible every day
I read up on my old blog that I terminated back in October of 2005, where I found a post that crushed me. It talked about my grandma “...[being] about to recover from cancer for the second time in the past few years. Now that she is on the speedy road to recovery, we don’t have to wear masks around her. We haven’t had that luxury in a month and a half. She should also be getting her hair back soon. Too bad we can’t say the same for Dad.” She died about 7½ months later.
Looking at that last bullet, I almost want to be mad at God. She was so close to recovery, but then suddenly went south. Actually, in some respects, she dies because she couldn’t go south. She was gonna go to Houston but Hurricane Rita beat her there and one thing just led to another. It reminds me of “Matthew | 012 Rob Bell” where he talks about losing a close friend of his. But, in the video, he also talked about how Jesus dealt with loss. That ended up being a very helpful video for me. It was also cool because it had German subtitles on the DVD.
Looking back through the past posts on this blog, I notice how much Rob Bell has influenced my spiritual life as well as the way I compose my posts. People who know Rob Bell really well can look through my posts and see what I mean... we both start off with a story and talk about it, then tell how it relates to Christ and how it can be applied. I strongly suggest that if you haven’t seen any of his videos, you go to Mardel and get them or order them online at www.nooma.com.
And thus concludes Season 1, except for Awards Night.
Great day in sports today. Just as I predicted in the last post, I went to church. I somehow ended up with the job of unofficial door greeter. We came back home and started watching the stuff for the Indy 500. Some of my other cousins are here to eat lunch and watch the race with us. Tonight, my belovéd Dallas Mavericks face the Phoenix Suns that I despise so much for stealing Steve Nash. The series is tied at 1-1. I didn’t always care about basketball; in fact, I never really followed the Mavs until earlier in the season. And yet, my “Mavs Fever” has rubbed off on my parents. My dad, who would never have given a care before, was searching for a station where we could listen to Game 2 on the way here. My mom asked me who won Game 7 when the Mavs were playing the Spurs. They even joined me in watching the Round 1 series between the Suns and Lakers, and groaned whenever the Lakers lost and cheered with me when they won. I guess I have quite an influence on my parents.
I just find it odd that it’s so easy to join people in some silly sports obsession that comes once a year for each sport, and yet nobody joins each other in Bible study groups outside of church. I tried to form one once last year, but it never caught on. My church up here in Tulsa makes a big point out of outreach. I think that everyone should do something of that nature.
Leave a comment on this post; I want to hear how/if other people agree with this. And, for those that do, we could maybe start an online study group?
Something to think on; and now, I must join my family in watching their race.
I just finished what may be my final full day of school at Frisco High School ever. I’ve said my [possibly final] goodbyes to my friends and all that. I’ve also done a few things with the yearbook. One thing I’m doing is counting mistakes. I’m rather picky about Dummkopf* mistakes. Those will be here when I finish them; I’m about a third of the way through and I’ve already spotted 62 dumb errors.
Another thing I’ve been doing is signing people’s books with Bible verses. Here are a few:
“Have a ‘fruity’ summer... John 15:1-8
Make like a hawk and prey... Jude 1:20-21
(To a close friend who talks about sick things) The Bible is full of advice that would be useful to you... Leviticus 18:7
Laugh often, but not too often... Genesis 18:15
Y’all are allowed to use any of those that you want to. You’re gonna have to look up the verses on your own, though.
Anyway, just sharing some nerd fun and some Christian fun with you.
Yes, the idea of counting goofs in the yearbook is how nerds have fun.
This coming weekend, my Boy Scout troop is going on a campout. I’m the assistant patrol leader for the Lightning Bolts, but our real patrol leader won’t be there for the whole thing. For the first time ever in my scouting history, I have responsibility as patrol leader. I’m in charge of tent assignments, making sure my patrol is doing their duties during meals, and keeping our campsite under control so it will be good when the patrol leader arrives. Pretty sweet deal, as lame and boring as it sounds.
I know what you’re wondering... “This is a Christian blog; how does this hooplah tie in to Jesus?”
(If that’s not what you’re wondering, then you obviously need to visit here more often; you don’t understand me well at all.)
This is my moment in the sun... my chance to show that I can be a good leader and handle responsibility. But then again, everyone has that chance. Whether you realize it or not, God Himself has given you a responsibility to witness to others and be Christlike. I’m not one to say that I’ve been perfect in that department; I’ll be the first to admit that I am far from it. But if there’s one thing I learned from the story of Jonah, it’s that God doesn’t give us more than we can handle as long as we rely on Him.
I learned at church just yesterday that the Holy Spirit speaks through us; so, in that case, even if we think we’re the ones delivering the message, guess what... NOPE! I encourage people to read the story of Moses (first few chapters of Exodus) and see how he thought he couldn’t do what God asked. Then you’ll see how this last paragraph fits in with the previous one.
Where have I been? I’m sure that my faithful visitors (both of you) have been wondering what happened to me.
Very interesting story.
I admit, it’s my own fault nothing has been posted here since January. Since that time, several things of note have happened.
03.08: My grandma dies after her cancer tumor grows so large that it both applies pressure to her heart and makes motion in her right arm all but impossible 03.15: I turn 16 and get a new videogame that kinda takes over my life
04.07: My best friend (Justin) turns 17; I thorw a surprise party for him and take him to see The Benchwarmers*.
04.10-04.21: My dad stays at work late almost every night in preparation of releasing the next version of his company’s program “TurboTax.”
The main focus of this post is the event from March 8th.
My grandma is no longer around, but that’s okay with me. Everything is better for her now. No pain, no confusion, no sorrow... it certainly makes my life easier knowing that she is alright now.
I got a new Bible a few days ago... it’s pretty sweet.
In my quest to read Genesis thru Revelations, I am currently in Exodus. The significance in that is that I started on Monday (the day I got it). I challenge everyone to try and keep up with me, but beware: I’m not going easy on anyone.
I am in Ponca City, Oklahoma, with other family members as we celebrate my grandmother’s birthday.
Here’s the catch, though: her birthday isn’t until the 29th.
We originally planned to come into town next weekend, but we don’t expect her to make it to next Sunday. She has been sick with cancer since late in 2004, and at this point the best that can happen is whatever God does. In other words, it’s just about over for her. She asked to be put on hospice and to see “all her babies” (me, my brothers, my cousins, my parents, my aunts, and my uncles) one last time. Both my brothers missed school yesterday, and I would have, too, if it weren’t for my little ego thing and wanting to tough it out.
And yet, even though I had to visit the counselor out of grief yesterday, I have this funny feeling that it’s all going to be fine whether or not Grandma makes it. Even in the midst of the pain, my uncle and I are still finding time to fling a hackey-sack around and watch Duke take a pounding in basketball. I am actually excited for Grandma, because I know that she will soon be happy.
Ever since Al Fike (my favorite stand-up comedian) said that, it’s kinda turned into my catch phrase. When Al Fike said it, though, he was talking about “how hard it is to praise Jesus while you’re going through some kind of traumatic experience like being beat.” He said that he could have been yelling “Whoo, yes! Thank You Jesus for this whippin!” But let’s be realistic. Does it really make sense to praise Jesus when you’re fixin’ to die!? No. And doesn’t God know it! So now we get to the million-dollar question: Why does God let bad things happen to us? Why is there pain? Or, in other words, if God knows it’s hard for us to praise Him during pain, why does He send it our way?
There are many answers, but the two I heard at church yesterday are my favorites. The first came from a confused little kid: “If God didn’t give us pain, then He’d have to give more pain to Jesus on the cross, and then Jesus wouldn’t be able to come back alive.”
But the second one came from the pastor himself. I’m not perfect, so I hardly remember the whole sermon, but what I do remember is that pain comes from man. We have free will, so it’s our own dang fault we have to endure this stuff; we allowed pain to rule our lives. I like the Princess Bride philosophy: “Life is pain. Anyone who tries to tell you differently is selling something.”
Let’s backtrack real quick. Free will, right? There’s no point in Him creating us if we’re forced to love Him. It has the same effect as giving yourself a gift... it just isn’t as special.
I hate pain, but I’ve learned to accept it. Adios.
There’s more to life than girls. Look back on your past week and that becomes perfectly clear. You often never realize what you’re really doing until you see what the effect is.
Let’s look back on my week, for example. In fact, there are actually some good examples from last night, when I went to a lock-in with Boy Scout troop 216. When I went rock climbing, I felt like I was just going through the motions and whatnot. But after doing some ballaying, I saw that lots of younger Webelos were watching me and following my examples. Several 5th graders that otherwise wouldn’t have understood the concepts of it figured it out by watching me. As “whatever” as that sounds, it helped them get their merit badges for climbing. One more merit badge was added to their Boy Scout “transcript,” which is one less they have to take to reach Eagle rank. Of course they owe it to more than just me, though.
Bees go out doing their own little thing, too... cross-pollinating flowers. They don’t necessarily realize that they are helping with nature, but they are. But, when you look at the big picture, aren’t we all?
So take a few moments to look at the roses you cross-pollinated unknowingly. I know, that ending sounds nothing like me, but I saw a post on my uncle’s blog and had to put it here.
I’m antimaterialistic. For those of you who don’t know how to pronounce that (*cough* Nathan *cough*), it is “an-tie-muh-teer-ee-uh-LIST-ic.”
Okay, as you see, I have made antimaterialistic into a word that anyone can understand. That’s what we need to do with the Bible. Don’t try to walk up to someone that doesn’t know a bit of Bible and tell them that they are sinners. Tell them they have done bad things. But don’t stop there. Tell them that doing bad things is human nature, and that it is forgivable no matter what it is. Like that commercial... except that instead of “you can find it on eBay,” now it’s “God can forgive it.” See where I’m going? (If not, it isn’t your fault... it’s too late at night for me to be online and still get my thoughts out normally.)
Today, my mom was listening to Mark Levin, an infuential republican talk show host. Why do we need to listen to him, anyway? I mean, our family is already full of ’publicans. It’s not like we need to listen to him so we don’t fall into the evil hands of the liberals. No, we listen to him so we have more ammo against those liberal whackos. (No offense, all you lefties out there.)
This corresponds to why we read the Bible. It’s so that don’t we fall into the hands of Satan (or John Kerry). We will have more meat against that stupid devil (I mean Satan this time) if we read the Bible.
Like I have room to talk. I think the last time the Bible came off my shelf (not for church) was when I tried to read the whole thing through in 5th grade. I still have the bookmark right where I left off 5 years ago... Genesis 6. Hrmph. I’ma try to get caught up next year. Join me... I will post the reading calendar online in whatever format (probably HTML).
Happy Thanksgiving, ya’ll. I am not in Texas... I’m in Oklahoma. Today, I get to watch the Dallas Cowboys game with none other than my Uncle Doyle. He can be heard frequently throughout the game yelling his trademark phrase... “Git ’im! Git ’im! Git ’im!” I love that. It just isn’t Thanksgiving without him and the Cowboys.
Just like it isn’t Christmas without presents, right? Yeah. Even though we traditionally exchange gifts and then talk about the “Reason for the Season,” commercialism (or whatever you call it) tends to leave out the “Reason for the Season” part. Gee... wonder why... could it possibly be driven by the almighty dollar? Dur!
This Christmas, I’m not going shopping for presents. (Mainly because I have, like, $6 to my name?) Instead, I’m boycotting big commercialism-whatever and just making gifts for everyone. (I would love to tell you what I’m giving to my cousin, David, but he is right next to me...)
Have a great Thanksgiving, root for the Cowboys, don’t make fun of OSU this Saturday, and don’t go Christmas shopping unless you plan to buy me an iPod. NO!! I’ve become a victim of the Christmas thing!!
Remember way back in the day, when Pop-Tarts decided to upgrade to boxes with 8 Pop-Tarts instead of 6?
Yeah, me neither, I just saw it advertised on an old video tape the other day from back when I recorded Rescue 911 episodes. (Looking back, I think I only watched that show because it had rescue vehicles.) Anyhoo, on the commercial I’m referring to, it asked people if they “Like finding things?” If you’re like me - the average normal teenager - then you love finding things. Here is a short list of things I have found in the last week that I loved finding:
Hair gel
7 quarters
A bucket of candy labeled “Halloween 2001”*
A girlfriend
A reason to dump her
Like I always say, life is never boring. But do you think any things of note found me over the last week? If you “icks-nay on the irl-gay,” then no, not really. But let’s look back about 10 years. When I was like, 6, or something, Jesus found me. I bet you anything in the world that He was more excited to find me than I was to find that old Halloween candy. Even as delicious as melted chocolate is, I still think that Jesus is more excited to come into our lives than we could ever be.
Now do you understand why we’re supposed to go convert more people to Christ? Not for the glory, but because it will make Jesus happy.
Do you think that cheerleader I dumped would still be interested in coming to church with me? Only one way to find out... if only I had her e-mail address...
Okay, that joke is getting old. I’ll just be over here...
Please don’t get me wrong; this story is not here to glorify myself. What kind of hypocrite would I be? It is here to illustrate a point. Today, at lunch, my best friend was out of lunch money. So, I did the right thing and bought him a Twix bar. (I happen to remember from 7th grade that Twix is his favorite.) He tried to do the right thing and let me have a part of it. Even though I paid for it and I love Twix, I turned his offer down because I bought it for him.
That’s when I made an intelligent connection.
“Do you think that Jesus is ever going to come back down and say, ‘Hey, Justin, can I have back part of that eternal life I gave you?’ to you?” I asked him. He laughed.
But seriously. Jesus paid for our eternal life. I’m pretty sure He loves eternal life. Pretty cool. I have no idea where you can go with this connection, but some day I might compile all of these connections onto a bunch of CDs and sell them to people. I dunno. I guess that would go against what I always speak of. You know, Christian branding? Yeah. That.
@ 
Frisco Roughriders (7-11)
©2005-2009 Ryan T. Wilson and Justin Venezio
As I was watching the Mavericks a few nights ago, I couldn’t help but notice a sense of urgency in the Seattle home crowd. I’ve known for a while that there was a looming possibility of Oklahoma City laying claim to the SuperSonics in a year or two. What I didn’t stop to think about was how the Seattle fan base would react. I, being a native Okie, was excited that a legitimate sports team would land in my state. But now I can’t help but feel a little sorry for the fans in the Sonics’ home of 40 years.
Ahh, one of* the greatest Christmas movies of all time.
The only time I’ve ever gone that insane was in 7th grade, when my belovéd Oklahoma State Cowboys downed the OU Sooners 38-28. Let me tell you, I was a nut job during that game, especially when OSU jumped ahead 35-6. Following the game, I danced in the street in front of my uncle’s house, spiking my football and shouting the final score for almost an hour.
